To the best... No inferences necessary. Really.

Actual poetry work in progress...

Sign posts don't let you know
how much you've let yourself go
Swinging into a new lusty deep
emerging from a cocoon of sleep.

Dreams are meant to be the thing
that keeps you glued in focused reality
But they only make me itchy for
glass baubles held beyond my reach

I'm sorry I didn't make things clear
It's a weakness I don't like to admit


A Work in Progress

I let myself slide into an unfamiliar need.
A poor reconstruction of the former less broken me.
Verbal warnings were impossible to speak
of damaged emotions so out of my reach

I'm sorry I didn't make things clear
It's a weakness I don't like to admit
I didn't even understand the fear
That made me crawl into this.

Soft attention was a gentle silencing word
against the background of pain I'd heard
I don't resent the gift you'd offered
But I don't know how I should have responded

It's from that I keep pulling and pulling
becoming so much more of what I used to be
Unrecognizable to the version you know
headed down a road I've taken before

I'm sorry I didn't know myself
and all of the things I'd eventually need/want
It's just that I couldn't even tell
who I was and how I'd be/?

Sign posts never let me know
How far I'd have to let myself go
Swinging into a new lusty deep
emerging from a cocoon of sleep

I'm sorry I didn't make things clear
It's a weakness I don't like to admit
I've left this behind while moving near
A future absent of painful relationships

A New Song I'm Crazy About

Tonight by Kate Walsh

You don't know about me
And you don't care what affair still haunts me
And you don't know what it is about me
And I don't care, I don't care if you love me

Tonight we'll be whoever we like
Tonight we'll leave our troubles behind
Tonight in each other we'll hide
Tonight will be alright...

And I don't know about you
And I don't care about the girl behind you
And I don't know what it is about you
It makes me want to run and jump inside you

Tonight in each other we'll hide
Tonight we'll leave our troubles behind
Tonight we'll be whoever we like
Tonight, tonight will be alright...

You don't understand why my heart feels bad
From the love you hold out in your hand
And you offer it without command
I just don't know why I can't get you inside,
Why I need you tonight...

Cause you don't know about me,
And you don't care how this affair will break me.
And why should I care about you, when you don't care,
You don't care that i love you?

Wanting...

To be free. Of many many things.

Life Plan*

* Can change in a day or even a half hour... as was witnessed by the rash and wonderful decision to go home for the spring.

Finish up Spring Semester at home earning as much money as I can
Summer in Scotland!
Compile presentation on dialects
Fall semester perform in Little Women and A Tale of Two Cities
Fall semester present dialects and Scotland forum
Winter semester, hopefully perform in Cake or Berlin
Spring/Summer 08 hopefully perform in Tuacahn Thoroughly Modern Millie and Les Miserables
Fall semester senior project
Winter semester show
New York Showcase results determine summer 09 work
Work Summer and Fall 09
Move to Burbank January 2010